Hannes war auf jeden Fall einer, der etwas von Romantik versteht. Ich meine damit nicht die erzwungene ‘Ich-verteile-Rosenblätter-auf-dem-Bett-Roma...tik’. Ich meine die ehrliche Sensibilität, zu erfühlen, was ich brauche. Eine Fußmassage, ein schöner Film in seinen Armen, ein heißer Kakao mit kleinen Marshmallows… So etwas in der Art. Für die meisten bisherigen Männer in meinem Leben sind das Dinge, die zum Vorspiel gehören und geflissentlich übersprungen werden können.Wir gingen also in. . about washing you with my hands, but I wanted to see what it was like ... see if ... it did anything for me.”After ten or 15 seconds of silence, I lifted my head off her shoulder and looked at her.“And,” I asked.She nodded her head shallowly, then whispered, “Yes. I ... enjoyed that; both ways.” She lifted her eyes off mine, looked to her right, then said, “I don’t want to do much more, but ... may I kiss you?”I inhaled deeply in response and stared into her dark mocha eyes for a few seconds,. I quickly pulled my hand back and tried to hide the flush of shame and self-hate that filled my face. I never tried to touch her again.Back at the bar, Celeste and I got stinking drunk over the next four hours. Beers and shots and slammers, empty glasses accumulating on the bartop. Money ran out before desire to consume more did, and I helped her to my car, taking her keys with me. I didn’t want her driving, even though I was in no condition to drive myself. With typical male macho thinking, I. Waiting. I asked her some more questions, and instructed her to repeat herself louder occasionally when she answered. The questions were making her a bit tense, I could tell so as I was gliding my fingertips around her breasts, touching her nipples, pinching them lightly to make her wince, I kept the questions going forcing her to answer more and more uncomfortably. I gave her scenarios she’d obviously be uncomfortable with and asked if she would do them for me. She knew the answer would have.
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